Hettienne Ma

Stoppers

In Uncategorized on February 15, 2011 at 6:52 am

STOPPERS

(Extracted from Dance of Life by Audrey Savage)

We constantly find ways to stop our flow between Need and Finishing.  Each of us finds favourite ways to interrupt our smooth flow.  We obstruct, block, hold  back, hinder, rationalize, or impede in many was.  We all do it, often need to do it, and usually don’t recognize doing it.

For instance, if your need is a drink of liquid, you may be stopped on your path to the source of the liquid by a friend who just has to tell you the latest news, by a ringing phone or by an inability to find a source.  These obstructions come from outside of you.  However, most stoppers come from inside.

You can find stoppers or ways to obstruct fulfilling your need at each level of your cycle of experience.    The first is to be sure that you never know what the need is.  The best way of keeping yourself from recognizing your need is to numb yourself.  Your addictions will help you there.

Once you have recognized your need, you can stop yourself from going further by denying that the need is important.  For instance, your need is to understand why you are so depressed.  You tell yourself stories, ‘I am not depressed’,  ‘If I am depressed nobody hurts but me’,  If I try to find out why I’m depressed, I’ll just get more depressed’, etc.

If denial doesn’t stop your need, and your body should get into gear for action the next step would be to make the excitement go away.  Depressing your actions or feelings often works here.  You can keep your body from getting excited about anything.  Another way is to get excited about everything.  For instance, you cannot decide and you flatten your excitement until the need seem to disappear.

If you are in the middle of taking an action and want to stop, you can physically halt your movement.  You can will your muscles to slow down, to stop and even to relax.  For instance, if you are angry with someone and your need is to hit him or her, your higher mind can tell you to hold back.  However, this often leaves a residue of conflict in your muscles.  This action can also be used to stop yourself from going dancing, going to work or playing.

Other ways to interrupt the flow of your connection is to rigidly follow a set of rules that does not fit the situation.  Your need is for a relationship.  You cannot go out with an attractive person because you always do your laundry on the day you were invited.  You lose your chance.

Or you can blame the other for anything that is not as you would have it.  Your need is to find a way to pay the bills.  You blame your job, your boss, your friends, family, or lover, and your status.  You blame everything but yourself and the way you earn and handle your money.

The last stopper : once you have what you think you need, hang on tight.  Never let go.  If your need was thirst, never stop drinking.  If your need is a relationship, never let the person be independent, or separate.  If your need is rest, stay in bed forever.  If your need is knowledge, do nothing but read books, confer with teachers or look for that next degree.

As often you stop yourself out of habit or for worn out reasons.

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